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 The world I know..~

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PostSubject: The world I know..~   Sat Mar 27, 2010 3:11 pm

Light droplets of yesterday's rain fall upon the pale skin of a girl sitting on the grass. This girl looks lonely, this girl looks cold and dead. But she is not dead, she is very much alive. There is a part of her that is dead that no one will ever see. This girl. . . is me. My name is Ayaka Kurusugawa, no one will ever know the story of my past. No one shall ever see the horrors I have because society is claimed "too good for that." Lies! No one will ever understand me, no one. No one.

There I sat without a care as to life, the world or anything. I thought a couple of people in the past might have changed me, changed the way I was, brought me back, but they didn't. It was all hopeless and useless to spend that time I did with them. Not one of them helped. I saw they had intentions, they did have potential, but not one of them dare unlock it. They were either scared or selfish to keep that to themselves. I had to start over once more. A rogue as I was before, I had travelled on foot all the way through the forest. I think I deserve a well rested session. The night before it had rained, some of the droplets from the trees above my head shook the water off of them as if they were dogs just released from a bath. It not only did fall upon my skin but the case, the sheath for my sword as well. As I moved my leg to a comfortable position, the sword sheath moved with me slightly. It grazed the ground and I only shifted my gaze to its view. Lazily, I faintly smirked, running a hand upon it gently. This, this sword, this sheath, they were my only allies. The only ones who wouldn't betray me, but obey me. Something I valued and respected. 'Ketsukei no Hana.' That is what I named my sword and this sword shall carry me through life till death do us part.

Alone I was, and that's all I'll ever be. The rain droplets started to annoy me, and so I stood up rather quickly. As I did, my memories of not only my childhood, but of my former sensei hit me. Of my teammates, the ones who wished to call me their "friend." I had fought my mightiest, I had attained power and gotten stronger thorugh the years. I still wasn't where I hoped to be, genin rank and I wanted to once again be able to attain power and up my ranks. The thought of my statements of how similar my sensei and my mom seemed was ridiculously uncanny. That's it! I couldn't take it. Secodns later after that thought hit me, I dashed out of the forest as if running from a murderer. I hadn't a clue why my mind was making me do this, why suddenly my heart sank into my stomach, and that felt like it was going to somehow fall out of me. I had no hypothesis as to why my mind was playing tricks of the thoughts of my past, and giving me more wants and needs than I ever desired. I knew what I was going to do now, find my former sensei, and teammates. Maybe I can be reunited, however I don't know why. The reasoning for wants and needs are always shrouded in an air of mystery. A cloud of wonder, that which one must desolve by self-will.
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